Be kind.

First week of summer school. So far, two days working from home.
The monkey has been behaving amazing. This kid is so happy being at home. He is on his swing, then goes for a swim in the pool, then showers, then watches some TV, then runs outside, and then plays on his iPad. Repeat.
My husband takes my car to work so the monkey doesn’t ask for car rides. He doesn’t see the car, so he figures we can’t take him. This is a great solution so that I can work without those distractions.
He has been doing great.
But to say it has been tough, well that’s an understatement. It has been very very tough.
I have meetings to attend, trainings to take, work to be done. It is difficult when I have to constantly make sure this kid is taken care of. If he is swimming, I will be outside making sure he’s safe. Even though he is an amazing swimmer; we still need to be there all the time. And it has been so hot! While he’s swimming, I’m on the shade working, pouring in sweat! I’m trying so hard to multi-task. I need to focus on work, and make sure he’s safe.
Yesterday I was in a meeting. My daughter had stopped by after class had ended to get ready to go to work. She had about half an hour to hurry up, eat, shower, and get ready for work. During my meeting, I was downstairs. The monkey had been running up and down the stairs laughing and giggling.
I started a new department recently. This means that most of my meetings are not very easy. Since I am still learning, I need to focus, to review my notes, to ensure I’m on top of everything. In the beginning of something new, it always takes much longer.
Having that said, I’m in a meeting, looking over notes while they are asking questions. I have my headphones on so that I can ensure I hear everything and try to not have too much noise interfering from the monkey in the meeting.
My daughter runs downstairs, touches my shoulders. She had a worried look: The monkey’s tv fell! I drop everything and run to see if he’s ok.
Turns out the monkey was jumping on his bed. He just got a new bed and thought it was funny to jump. I told him to stop, and he did. But of course, he started again without me knowing. We have a video camera on his bedroom, and I try to make sure he is behaving while he is there. One of the times he was jumping, he accidently hit the tv and it fell on the bed. Good thing the tv is very light weight. We checked the monkey, and he is fine.
But this made me really stop and think: Can I really do this? Can I work from home and take care of the monkey? I feel I am not fully functional in my job and not fully there for my son. I honestly feel like a failure. But unfortunately, we cannot simply enroll him in day care. He needs a lot more attention than the local daycare can provide. We have tried other routes, but it just doesn’t seem to pan out.
I’m fortunate to have a job where I can work from home most of the days. But that doesn’t mean it is easy.
But I remind myself it will only be for two months. Plus, my husband is home on Wednesdays. This makes my schedule a bit easier to take. I work from home Mon and Tues. Wednesdays I get to go to the office. And then I’m back to working from home Thurs and Fridays. Then we get the weekend!
I told my husband my shoulders are hurting so much from the stress. On Monday when he got home, I went upstairs, took a long shower, and laid in bed to read a book. I needed a break.
Yesterday my daughter took a picture of me. I’m in a virtual meeting, the monkey is hugging me and trying hard to sit on my lap (he’s a tall kid), all while I’m trying to work. She sent the picture to our family group messenger. I added the description: this is what working from home looks like. LOL
On a side note, we have been sleeping amazing! I want to say 2 weeks straight where the monkey doesn’t wake up once! Full night sleep helps a lot!
My co-workers always tell me that I take it so well. I show up to the office, or attend virtual meetings and they would have no idea that we were not sleeping (before) or having to multitask at home. I was able to handle the TV incident and go back to meetings without any interruptions. They would not have known that I was almost out of breath on how fast I ran upstairs to check the monkey out. All while my headphones were on as I was hearing the meeting discussions.
But many of us go thru so many things, and we don’t show it. Most of us don’t want to show the loads we carry. Many may not feel comfortable talking about what we are dealing with.
And this is another reminder that we should always be kind. One never knows.
Until then, I will be counting the days for when class starts again in the Fall!

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